of ‘love’ as swiftly as the sun dips behind the horizon- only to be followed as swiftly by the effervescent moon. My inclination towards a particular personality trait within all my men, along with a more, physical so to speak, attribute is uncanny and often the catalyst to my decline. However, my constant need to have some sort of vessel to direct my longing and merciless daydreams is overwhelming and must be satiated. For, if I am to spend a day with no one to search for along the streets, and no one to brighten my eyes as they speak a mere word to me, then my day has been wasted. I long more than anything, for one soul to quench my thirsts and desires, instead of this constant pinwheel of hopeless prospects.
I’m just B-12 deficient, which for vegetarians is to be expected. I’ll just have to take a few B-12 shots for a bit. Apparently, B-12 deficiency can cause you to be extremely tired, which would explain why I’ve only been up for nine hours today, and I’m already headed back to bed.
I’d like to sit alone in a corner laced with nature’s finest and strung with white lights, a never-ending earl grey latte, infinite books, and good music for the rest of my life. I’d sit there in the world I have created around me, free of all the insecurities and flaws of the natural world, in utter ignorant bliss. Then I’d become lonely as my ink-and-paper friends began to fade and long for another world; perhaps filled with people, insecurities, and everything we take for granted.
to feel so alone when so many people surround you? to be so horribly sad when evening chats with friends are abundant? to be so achingly depressed when text messages fill your phone daily? to feel like such an outcast even with people eagerly waving in the hallways?
i believe it is, when everyone you love is so far out of reach.